From the corners of the Curve.

Plus size Fashion, Travel and Lifestyle blog.

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Thursday, 8 December 2016

The friendship breakup


Breaking up with a boyfriend isn't something I have ever experienced, being that Dan was my first and only real partner, but I get the idea of how ending a relationship works especially having watched my friends go through many over the years. They can be pretty rough to deal with, especially when you have been together such a long time. But breaking up with a friend is something that most of us don't talk about. Friendships are much alike relationships, some even more intense than between two partners. Your friend is a person you share every minor detail of your life with, some you let in and tell your deepest darkest secrets too, ones you might not even tell your partner. They know about your faults, your insecurities your past and your present. When something bad or good happens, you know that your BFF is one of the first to be called, you enjoy sharing in each others joy, you laugh together, cry together, share experiences together, the love runs pretty darn deep. 

So when your friendship changes or ends this can be pretty hard going for both parties. Sometimes, naturally, friends drift apart, you start to talk less to each other, perhaps you start making new friends, trying new things, just becoming different people to the ones you both were before. When this happens the very glue that made your friendship stick starts to deteriorate and before long the relationship can become something so far from what is was to begin with.

There are a few types of friendship breakups, some that end naturally, with no discussion, and what you had just fizzles out, and some where things end really, really badly. Passive aggression, arguments back and forth on text, screaming at each other, saying spiteful, hurtful things, this can and does happen. Like all relationships, disagreement is natural but sometimes there is no coming back from what was said, and sadly sometimes there is no going back to what you once were.
Then there are friendships that end with no resolve, sometimes a friend can just phase you out, or even completely cut you out of their life, ignore your texts, avoid you, delete your entire existence, those can be the worst to deal with, because there is no real resolve. Social media makes ending friendships so much harder than ever before. Seeing 'Ex friends' on mutual friends Facebook page, tagged in photos can be tough, but nothing hurts like seeing old memories pop up of you and your friend together when times were really good. We are plagued with our past and this can cause terrible anxiety, it certainly does for me.

Of all the things I am anxious about in my life, the ending of past friendships is what is most difficult to deal with. Questions about who is responsible, where did it go wrong, why did it end?  These all run through my mind continuously. As a person, I have always needed validation, I need to be needed, I care so deeply that sometimes I overstep the mark into territory that perhaps is not my place to step. 

Are there things I regret about how I handled my friendships? Absolutely.  Was I at times not the best person or friend I could have been? Most probably. Sometimes I sit down and think that I am a terrible, awful, person. Maybe I can't keep friends, maybe I am too judgmental, maybe I am too sensitive...These thoughts whizz around my mind like a merry go round and leave me with a tight knot of anxiety in my chest. The battle I have with myself is hard, and it has taken me a long time to get over lost friendships. Sometimes I find myself looking through old photos, or listening to a song that sends me right back to a place in time where things were great and the guilt washes over, all over again. 

But the truth is, in the end it doesn't matter.  In life we will go through making mistakes in our personal relationships or become victim to others making mistakes, it's the circle of life, not one of us out there is perfect and that is bloody normal. Now, more than ever I am beginning to learn that some things are just meant to be, sometimes other factors in our life change who we are, the priorities we have change and the company we keep changes. It's all part of our individual growth and whether the path you are on is the right one, it is your journey to take. Unfortunately along the way we will lose people in our life, be that from the nature of death or the journey of our lives, this may sound like a load of philosophical shit but I truly believe that every single thing that happens to us, is perfectly timed and meant to happen. 

And If I could say one thing to past friends that I am no longer friends with it would be simply to wish them well, to say sorry for any bad blood, or anger that is held. There was a reason we were drawn to each other at some point in our lives and for the times we had I am grateful. Live and let live and all that malarchy.  For me, 2017 will be a year of new personal discovery and I have no doubt that I will f**k up and make some hideously bad decisions. And although my friendship breakups have been hard my past has taught me some real important stuff about myself and the friends I still have and I will always be grateful for that.
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Wednesday, 30 November 2016

My favorite Wide Fit boots for Winter



So here's the thing, I hate my feet, like, actually hate them and if I could rub a genie bottle, make a wish and swap my feet I would, in a heartbeat! There are so many shoes that I have admired over the years that I knew would never fit on my pork chop feet, and growing up with wide feet, especially was not easy.  Back in the day virtually no shops catered to the wider fit customer, unless they were ugly old lady shoes. Oh and don't even get me started trying on shoes in store which was/is an actual work out when you have wider feet, trying to fit into shoes that will only house your big toe.
The thing is having a wider foot is actually not just an issue for plus size women, but for all kinds of women and now more than ever brands are giving us choices that provide both comfort and style meaning you don't have to compromise one for the other. Today I thought I would round up my favorite wide fit boot from the specific wide fit ranges at  ASOS , Evans, River Island and New Look I every girl needs a good pair of boots to get through the winter months so treat yourself to something that actually fits. To see more use the arrows to scroll!

SHOP MY FAVOURITE WIDE FIT BOOTS 
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Tuesday, 29 November 2016

Coats to keep you warm this winter




Winter is here, the heating is on in my house every day now, as soon as I get in I switch that bad boy to full whack, because there is nothing worse than feeling a chill in your own home am I right? Now that we are heading into the colder months, finding a warm coat is imperative, as sadly we can't all just lock ourselves away in the safety of our warm houses (that would be the dream though) and I think I have founder the winter warmer winner - The Faux Fur ( Faux always because eww to hurting baby animals for fashion)

I love me some Faux Fur, both aesthetically and for warmth, when I wear it I feel like a boss lady who also happens to be toasty and warm laughing at all the suckers out there in their light coats. 
As always Elvi delivers with style and this coat is a winner.  See below for a round up of my favorite Faux Fur looks:








SHOP MY LOOK

Skinny ripped Jeans - Evans Clothing




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Thursday, 24 November 2016

The guilt of Black Friday


I think it's safe to say that this year has been testing and trying on all of us in someway, whether it has been something that has directly happened to us, or simply the things that go on the world around us 2016 has been tough. I often feel immense guilt when I see something horrible happening like the violence at Standing Rock , the continued damage of Trumps Presidency or the horrific atrocities happening in Syria and I feel like, simply sharing a news story on my Facebook page just isn't enough. To see these atrocities dotted among advertisements for Black Friday Deals or half price offers sometimes makes me feel uncomfortable and I feel particularly guilty being a blogger or fashion writer, when part of my job is to sell things and I wonder whether it is appropriate, especially when the world is falling to shit around me.




It is something I battle with and I having thought deeply on this especially being a blogger. I have come to realise that checking out every now and then is part of self care, taking a minute to treat yourself to something you have worked hard for is okay, buying that face mask or those lush bath bombs for yourself to take a long relaxing bath, is okay. Buying an item of clothing that makes you feel confident and good is okay. As well as this buying something for someone you love can be incredibly rewarding. I personally love to buy Dan little presents when the deals come up, he treats me like a queen every day so every now and then I enjoy surprising him to his favorite aftershave or some new trainers. What I have also realised is that it is important to put money towards helping others and so today rather than just share black friday deals I will also be sharing a list of charities that are believe are doing worthy things to help others in desperate times of need. Remember to hug your loved ones tight and tell them you love them every day guys and if you do get some good deals that will be gifts for your loved ones at Christmas take a moment to look at them opening them because when its all said and done they are the real gifts in life.


My personal Charity choices and where to donate:






Legal Defense fund for Standing Rock - Donate via PayPal here 

Breast Cancer Care - for my brave friend Lauren Mahon who is currently battling Cancer 

Wandsworth Rotary Club - Help give an elderly person a meal over Christmas  (this is where dan and I volunteer every Christmas and where these photos in this post are taken) 

Crisis - Support homeless people in this terrible cold weather

Syria Relief - provide help towards medical, food, water and educational supplies 
Sisters Uncut -  Support victims of Domestic Violence by fighting against Austerity 













And if you would like them here is a round up of deals 

 20% off using code GOGOGO


20% off with code WONDER 

Up to 50% off no code £1.99 delivery with code FRIDEL

18% off with code RUSH

40% off with code 19805

20% off almost everything with code AP380




* All the deals above contain an affliate link if you don't feel comfortable using those I completely understand, feel free to use the codes.
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